Remember:
you are not who you think you are. You are what you do. Be the kindness of soft rain. Be the beauty of light behind a tall fir. Be gratitude. Be gladness.

— Kathleen Dean Moore
Wild Comfort: The Solace of Nature

poetry.us.com

With poetry.us.com, Mark Thalman — teacher, poet, and one-man poetry promoter — shines a light on his favorite writers with a website featuring their books, poems and advice.

Sometimes a writer just needs a little nudge. Sometimes a well-timed keep on really does make a difference.

Here, a few of my favorite tips:

It’s been said over and over, but truly it’s the best advice I can give: Read poetry widely and deeply for joy, for love of it, for what it can teach you about how to write, and for what it can teach you about being human in this beautiful and difficult world.

 — Patricia Fargnoli

Keep writing. (Threshold took me more than ten years to write.)

Keep submitting. (Before it finally won, Threshold was a finalist in twenty-five national book contests).

Never give up.

— Jennifer Richter

As for advice for others, it is really simple:  Read! Read! Read!

— Linda Pastan

People talk about being writers, dream like writers, travel like writers, party like writers, but don't write much.  We need experiences, sure. But the writers are home writing.  

— Henry Hughes

Advice I often give to my students: Don’t tell a poem what to do; listen to what it wants.  If you don’t understand this, get a cat.

— Tim Barnes

Your turn! Do you have a favorite piece of advice, or a tip to share with other writers?

The next day I praised the lavender blooming from the heat.

The next day I cursed the aphids.

It's like that this week. My gratitude has got some bumps, and I'm clutching three small words: help, thanks, wow.

Gratitude begins in our hearts and then dovetails into behavior. It almost always makes you willing to be of service, which is where the joy resides. It means you are willing to stop being such a jerk. When you are aware of all that has been given to you, in your lifetime and in the past few days, it is hard not to be humbled, and pleased to give back.

— Anne Lamott
from Help, Thanks, Wow

It's Thankful Thursday, a weekly pause to express gratitude for people, places, things & more. Joy contracts and expands in proportion to our gratitude. What makes your world expand?

As a child I was certain she had peered into my life and written books just for me: Are You There God? It's Me, Margaret, and Blubber and Deenie. I wrote her a letter of earnest appreciation — and she wrote back! I don't remember her words but I do recall that it was the first time I saw a writer as a real, warm and human person. 

Over the years I've read again and again Letters to a Young Poet, a compilation of letters Rainer Maria Rilke wrote to an aspiring writer. I like the idea of mentor-by-mail.

"In a letter," writes Anne Carson," both reader and writer discover an ideal image of themselves, short blinding passages are all it takes."

A few years ago, I wrote a letter to a poet whose work I admired, and though we shared a mutual friend, never was a word returned.

Today I read of a long and rich correspondence between two writers a generation apart. I feel awe, and a bit of envy, too.

How about you? Do you write to writers? Or did a reader write to you? Do you have a tale to tell?

After brief dismay (money to buy poetry?! this is a rare and wonderful occasion), my mind raced and whirled. How to choose? Award-winning books? Classic poetry? Contemporary? Regional? Mainstream favorites? My latest favorites?

After all the mental hubalub, I offered the following list of books I learned from and loved, the poetry collections that, though I didn't recognize at the time, shaped my writing life:

The Dream of a Common Language by Adrienne Rich
With a close command of language and line, Rich masterfully unspools experience.

A conversation begins
with a lie. And each
speaker of the so-called common language feels
the ice-floe split, the drift apart

Live or Die by Anne Sexton
Sexton was master of confession (long before social media saturation).

But suicides have a special language.
Like carpenters they want to know which tools.
They never ask why build.

What Narcissism Means to Me by Tony Hoagland
This book delivered revelation: a poem can be funny, witty, sarcastic, sad, and tell a story, and all at once!

The sparrows are a kind of people
Who lost a war a thousand years ago;
As punishment all their color was taken away.

The Way It Is by William Stafford
A model of productivity, Stafford wrote over 50 books — and his first was not published until age 46!

What can anyone give you greater than now,
starting here, right in this room, when you turn around?

The Beauty of the Husband by Anne Carson
Is this book a very long poem, or a semi-short story? Carson calls it “a fictional essay.” I call it brilliant.

XXIV. And kneeling at the edge of the transparent sea I shall shape for myself a new heart from salt and mud.

A wife is in the grip of being.
Easy to say Why not give up on this?
But let’s suppose your husband and a certain dark woman
like to meet at a bar in early afternoon.
Love is not conditional.
Living is conditional.

50 poems by e.e. cummings
Cummings showed me what a language could do, what a poem could be.

love is more thicker than forget
more thinner than recall
more seldom than a wave is wet
more freqent than to fail

The Book of Questions by Pablo Neruda
Yes, poems can be silly, surreal and stirring.

And what is the name of the month
that falls between December and January?

Why didn’t they give us longer
months that last all year?

And three more — not poetry, but poetic:

Dear Diego by Elena Poniatowska
A poignant, delicate story of art and unrequited love, told through letters.

Journal of a Solitude by May Sarton
As a younger writer, this book provided comfort and relief.

And it occurs to me that there is a proper balance between not asking enough of oneself and asking or expecting too much. It may be that I set my sights too high and so repeatedly end the day in depression. Not easy to find the balance, for if one does not have wild dreams of achievement there is no spur even to get the dishes washed. One must think like a hero to behave like a merely decent human being.

The Lover by Marguerite Duras
Tight, lyrical prose turns this intimate story about sexual awakening into a poetic, searing story of love.

Note: Don't worry, this process didn't dismiss local and lesser known poets. I also composed a list of regional favorites, and another poet gathered a list of Oregon's award-winning poets.

Now it's your turn. What's on your list? What books have stayed with you, have shaped your writing life?

In the random, eyes-closed, pick-a-name drawing to giveaway a copy of my book, Thin Skin, the winner is . . .

Sandy Mier

Congratulations Sandy. Thanks to everyone for reading, writing & responding.

Still burning to read Thin Skin? Don't deny your desire — buy the book at these fine locations:

• Push Pull Books (publisher - signed copies available here)

• West Side Books in Denver, Colorado (thanks Lois!)

• Mari's Books in Yachats, Oregon (thanks Mari, Mary & Jeanette)

• Amazon (thanks big anonymous warehouse)

 
Until next time . . . write on, read more!

On this Thankful Thursday-Friday, I am thankful for:

- the magic (okay, chemistry) of spray tans

- the relief of tears

- the unexpected companionship of you.

And by you, I mean, readers and writers and people near and far, that I have met and not met, that I have known and not known. Some days it strikes me the beauty of how this big and sometimes anonymous world can mysteriously opens its arms and let me in. Thank you, dear reader, for your attention, your literary love.

To show my appreciation, please let me give you a book. Win a copy of my new book, Thin Skin. The drawing is just days away and I want you (yes, you!) to win. Go here.

When your hands tremble and your voice quakes, relax your mouth, recall your best friend, and smile. The audience wants to like you. When you relax, your ease allows others to breathe a sigh of relief, too.

Hey, don't hang around here today — head over to Lisa Romeo Writes, where I offer Ten Tips to Giving a Good Reading. (My favorite is no. 8, Don't bring your husband).

Read the tips here  — then meet me in the comments to dish about your annoying and/or fabulous reading experiences.

Some days she writes just one line:

I like chocolate.

Last time she told me what she could say but couldn't write:

I've lived in four places. It was hard when I had to leave all my toys.

Maybe she's 8 or 10 or 15. Maybe her story is every story of nearly every child I now can't shake.

It's Thankful Thursday and here in this dark nook is gratitude for the young girl softly sounding out words like a prayer. When we come together I am "teacher" but mostly I listen and wait. We talk, and read, and write, and she is eager and willing. With the pencil in a fierce grip, her hand labors across the page. It's not easy but slow and deliberate she inches out letter after letter. Today she has something to say:

I am the old bike asleep in the rain.

It's Thankful Thursday, a weekly pause to express gratitude for people, places and things. What are you thankful for today?

How can I help the wounded if I don't welcome my own wounds?

— Father Gregory Boyle
sharing the words of a former gang member
in an interview with Krista Tippett
on American Public Media's On Being